Magnolia dreams

As the magnolia is blossoming in all her pink beauty on our balcony, we’re dreaming of a place where she can put down roots. But where to find a new home where she could grow? Reading Frances Hodgson Burnett’s The Secret Garden, I suddenly have my answer. Just follow in Mary’s footsteps: go outside everyday and a friendly robin will show you the key. On one of my walks through the city, I stop by a large magnolia tree. It reminds me of the first time my mum and I saw a magnolia. “Isn’t this the most beautiful tree you’ve ever seen? How I would love to have a tree like this one day!” my mum had said. She never did have one in her hillside garden. So when it was time to bury her, I knew it would have to be in the serene place underneath the majestic magnolia, with the branches gently swaying in the wind above her. And so having one in our garden would be a beautiful way to honour her spirit. For now, I tell myself to be patient and trust that what you seek is also seeking you.

Drops of light

As the fog slowly lifts from the river dale, we soak up a few hazy rays of sun. Around us the blue tits are flying to and fro between the trees. Looking up I notice a bit of Traveller’s-Joy climbing up the branches of one of them. Come, let’s take a look! When we get closer, I realise they aren’t the fruits of a clematis at all. Instead they’re branches covered in frost with their ends dipped in frozen water drops. The soft light makes them glisten like tiny diamonds. The silken threads of a spider web hang in the tree like a frosted garland. We cherish these beautiful gifts of nature, as we celebrate the arrival of midwinter by the pine tree. It makes me reflect on the values I want to pass on to our little one, especially in a culture that seems to be oriented towards gold. Whenever I feel lost, I find inspiration in Sharon Blackie’s The Enchanted Life. She writes about the everyday magic that comes from deepening our connection to the natural world. Be present and you can find wonder where ever you go.

Late bloomers

Out on our balcony garden the dahlias brighten my mood as the rain clouds drift by. I love how they remind me that it’s never too late to bloom. Growing up I always looked with envy at the kids who were blossoming; while I felt gangly and perpetually behind. I couldn’t have imaged then that I would be well into my thirties before I’d figure things out. Even as I was writing a PhD thesis on the topic of authenticity, I never once asked what all of that meant for me. It took a rather harsh wake-up call, before I started to build my life around the oak tree. Looking back I feel so blessed by the fact that I found the courage to leave the well-trodden path that others expected of me and to create a life filled with meaning and love. Not having lived a life true to themselves is the biggest regret people have at the end of their lives, as Bronnie Ware shows so beautifully in her book The Top Five Regrets of the Dying. So let these autumns flowers inspire you to be brave and live the way you want to.

Somewhere only we know

In the soft light of the evening sun, we wander around the secret garden underneath the pine trees. We marvel at all the wildflowers and the bees humming around us. It is the sweetest gift to discover the world together with our tiny unicorn. Her joy is infectious, her playfulness and wonder are enthralling. It took me a while to get to a place where things are easy, but it feels like we’ve really settled into the life that we share. People talk about the terrible twos, but I welcome her independence. Sure, holding boundaries is hard sometimes, but isn’t that true of all relationships? As Shefali Tsabary writes in her book The Awakened Family, we’d like our children to be autonomous thinkers and trailblazers, but not while they live with us. Our goal isn’t to raise an obedient child, but one who is firmly rooted in who they are, certain of their inherent worth, able to express themselves with authenticity and grounded in their relationships. Lest we forget, they are the author of their own lives.

Unicorn space

Most days there´s still a harsh wind, but then there are days like these, when the sunshine is warming my face and I forget about the winter past. With our little one all happy at pre-school now, I´m enjoying these quiet moments at the oak tree. As the blossoms of the sweet jasmine are swaying gently back and forth, I listen to the birds singing all around me. It makes me want to get into the swing of things here at the factory. To help me guard these pockets of time from the other demands in my life, I’m reading Find your Unicorn Space: Reclaim your Creative life in a Too-Busy World by Eve Rodsky. Unicorn space isn’t about getting a hobby or finding your passion, but about the active and open pursuit of creative self-expression in any form that makes you uniquely you. So many of my dreams have come true since I started this quest for authenticity, from writing my first short story to learning to draw. So don’t be afraid to dream big and then start with the smallest of steps. The time is now!